Luke 15:11-32
I once delivered a children’s sermon when this passage was the Gospel reading. I learned that it’s better to have a conversation with children than preach to them. I asked them a question: “Who was happy in this story?” A few hands raised and they said “The Daddy” and “the bad boy.” I thought it interesting that they had already judged the younger son as “bad.” Then I asked, “Who wasn’t happy in this story?” Sally said, “the fatted calf.” Jesus said we should have faith like a child to find the kingdom of God!
Who do you identify with in this story? I must admit I have often been more like the older son than the younger. I was a planner. I followed the rules. I had a vision for my future and worked hard to achieve it. My older brother was an artist. He claimed to have graduated High School without ever reading a book. He had the looks and got girls to write his book reports for him. He charmed his way through life, living well beyond his means.
Once my young son had an accident. He tried to jump from one cement planter bench in the mall to the next one. He almost made it. That was often the result of his daredevil exploits. He hit his chin on the concrete planter bench and we were off again to the Emergency Room. The nurses knew him by name. I sat there with a stern look on my face, while he stared at the floor waiting for my “I told you so.” But in the next section I heard a father really giving it to his son. “How many times have I told you not to do such stupid things? I told you that you would get hurt. Now you’re costing me a few hundred dollars because I don’t have insurance!” I heard his son sobbing and muttering “I’m sorry.” My son looked up, ready for me to unload on him. I felt shame. Finally, I smiled and said, “I love you son. It will be alright.” He started crying, but they were tears of joy.
Over the years I have found that many people don’t like the parable of the prodigal son. Doesn’t conform to their sense of fairness. I find many “older brothers” in our churches. Perhaps they miss the final point that the father made, “Son, you are always with me, and all that is mine is yours. But we had to celebrate and rejoice, because this brother of yours was dead and has come to life; he was lost and has been found.” This is how our loving heavenly Father looks upon all his children. None of us has earned his love: God gives it out of love. That’s the definition of grace.
“I told you so’s” can usually be justified. Maybe they even work at times. But in many instances, they do nothing to deepen a relationship, especially one that should be based on love. Rather they often harden the heart of the other person. And then the chance to build a loving, helping relationship can be lost.
We live in fractured times. Most postings I see on Facebook are angry and accusatory. Walls are going up, rather than coming down. And in my family, I have two daughters I love dearly who fear for their FAA jobs and future. Some people they know say, “This was your choice!” Another wall goes up when a shoulder is needed. That’s when I hug them and say, “We’re here for you if you need us. We love you. Come what may, we’ll face it together.”
I took me years to soften my heart and turn from “I told you so” to “I love you.” And when I look back on my life, I see many times when I deserved an “I told you so.” What makes those moments so special is remembering that I am loved by God not because I have slaved for him, but because I am his child. And that, my friends, is the Kingdom of God!
Meditation by the Reverend Canon Lee Powers
Diocese of New Jersey, Retired